ain't i the stupid one!!! HAHA... made a total fool of myself... wanna noe wat i did??? well, i went to hospital despite my earlier resolve not to go visit... haiz... y do my feelings get the better of me each time??? being concerned abt his condition, i went again... but i guess it'll be the last time ba... cos i juz felt so redundant lor... always me trying to start a conversation while he juz carry on doing his own stuff... then he decided to slp wif me juz sitting at the side... guess tat was the cue i wasnt needed ba... really glad tat his condition has improved over the past couple of days n hearing tat he could be discharged in a week or so, i was more than relieved... but think regardless of the time u gonna be warded, he wun be needing my help or company anymore ba... i really wished tat the reasons he gave me to my questions were true but it juz takes too much to convince myself tat they r... really have a feeling it's all gonna juz end at this ba... though the past half a year has been full of a lot of fun wif his company, think the time has come for the dream to awaken ba... afterall, the frens i wanna have wud perhaps only exist in my own dreams ba... really hate to give everything up juz like tat but i juz feel tat i'm being pushed further n further away... till the point i dun even have any idea wat he's thinking of anymore... if this is the way frenship works, i wud rather not have any frens from this moment on...