back again to update... update abt wat??? tat i'm back to square one once again... the day was actually uneventful but i'm here to write down wat i'm feeling at this moment in time ba... b4 my old mind fails me again...
till now, i've believed tat pple wud change over time... but guess i'm wrong in thinking this way... i, for one, has not changed a single bit since the beginning of the human race... always looking for the wrong things... things tat wud eventually upset me even more... haiz... think in chinese this wud be called ming4 jian4... perhaps i m ba... entangled in this endless spiral called life... haiz... dunno when it'll ever end... think i'll be going for a jog later to clear my mind... perhaps a car wud accidentally knock me down n hopefully everything juz ends there ba... pessimistic??? nope... is juz the way i view things now... this has perhaps been the unchanging way of thinking for me since long ago ba... haiz... nth happening tat can lift my spirit... even though i'm getting a new phone tml... one thing i have learnt perhaps is tat pple can only be good frens after a certain age ba... y??? dunno... the thing tat has taught me this is when i asked my old fren to help me pay for my new phone wif his credit card, he instantly agreed without even hesitating... haiz... makes me a bit guilty... havent been tat close to him ever since i left ntu... but he still so willing to help me... as for the rest of those "kids" who claim to be my frens, hmm... perhaps we were juz looking for company in the past for only a short moment ba... maybe tat's y one of the old issues still remains an unsolved case... *sarcastic laughter* in short, perhaps this blog wud not serve anymore purpose liao... now wif the tracker on my blog, i noe too much liao... so much so tat i think it's quite pointless to continue anymore... haiz... one thing someone said struck a chord in me... having money means being able to do many things... but wat i want is not being able to do things... i juz want frens who care abt how i feel... i dun want frens who come only when i got money n juz disappear short after i'm broke... i noe i've met a few of them aredi n i certainly dun wish to meet anymore... end of the day, it juz hurts even more... being able to afford the more expensive pleasures is no doubt a good thing... but there's no point in enjoying anything when u r all alone, even if it's juz an ice cream cone... unfortunately, as each day goes by, i feel tat i getting lonelier than ever... though i dunno y, it juz feels tat way ba... anyway, think i shd be ok in less than a month ba... the deadline to move out is approaching... halloween's nite...
Life is juz a warehouse wif very competent staff... the stock of disappointments wun ever run out...